Angel Of the Morning
by StarfallGalaxy
Summary: Nny/Edgar breakup, trying something new.


**A/N: So I listened to this song and thought 'break up fic that no one will read! Yay!' I own nothing!**

 _There'll be no strings to bind your hands_  
 _Not if my love can't bind your heart_  
 _And there's no need to take a stand_  
 _For it was I who chose to start_  
 _I see no need to take me home_  
 _I'm old enough to face the dawn_

Nny watched as Edgar's car left, counting the seconds it took for him to drive away. Then, ever so calmly, he punched the wall. Again and again, ignoring the pain as his skin broke to just keep hitting this damn wall that had started this.

It was the damn wall's fault he was crazy. That fucking wall and it's insatiable bloodlust and doughboys and...and-

An inhuman howl of rage tore through the young man's throat as he slammed his fist, feet, elbow, his _everything_ into anything that dared come into his sight. How dare they just lie there while he hurt so bad? How dare they be emotionless objects that didn't have to bother with things like emotions, desire or need? How dare they?!

They never had to feel this loneliness, this distance like Johnny did. They didn't fuck everything up with _sex_ and _want_ and _pleasure_ and _need_.

Why didn't they have to see the ugly morning, experience it?

 _Just call me angel of the morning, (angel)_  
 _Just touch my cheek before you leave me, baby_  
 _Just call me angel of the morning, (angel)_  
 _Then slowly turn away from me_

Nny watched as Edgar got up from the bed to go to the bathroom out of his half-lidded eyes. Was this what it was like to wake up next to someone? To want to feel their body close to you and them to get back into the damn bed already?

He hadn't been ready for the questions. He hadn't been ready for so much _feeling_ all at once because he had no idea what he was feeling. It was so mixed up in his brain. All he knew was it had felt good, that Edgar felt good, that this whole thing they had been doing.

He hadn't been ready. He wished he had immortalized that one perfect moment but he had been so tired...

He should've known that Edgar wouldn't stay.

 _Maybe the sun's light will be dim_  
 _And it won't matter anyhow_  
 _If morning's echo says we've sinned_  
 _It was what I wanted now_  
 _And if we're victims of the night_  
 _I won't be blinded by the light_

Is this what love felt like? This feeling of pure ecstasy?

"I love you. I love you. I love you."

He could here himself chanting it as Edgar did those awful, wonderful, disgusting, beautiful things to him as they kissed. Edgar had promised, hadn't he? He'd promised not to leave Nny alone in this house. He'd been so sweet and beautiful and promising and...

Had Nny started this? Who had leaned in first on the couch? Johnny was certain it was Edgar. Was it him? Or was it mutual?

A gasp torn from his already abused throat as Edgar moved above him. Oh, shit. They were doing this for real, weren't they? Nny wasn't dreaming, was he? Edgar was above, below, touching spots that Nny hadn't ever let anyone touch in forever.

This was it. The perfect moment.

Everything went white as Johnny made the decision to wait just a little bit longer. Edgar had promised him.

 _Just call me angel of the morning, (angel)_  
 _Just touch my cheek before you leave me, baby_  
 _Just call me angel of the morning, (angel)_  
 _Then slowly turn away_  
 _I won't beg you to stay with me_  
 _Through the tears of the day, of the years_  
 _Baby, baby, baby_

Johnny C. was lying on his floor crying. Edgar had _promised_ him he wouldn't leave him alone in this fucking house. He'd _promised_ to stay with Nny no matter what! The two of them were just meant to be this way, couldn't Edgar understand that? He was meant to be with Nny because Edgar understood him. Because Johnny had spent all week with Edgar, not harming him or anything. Now here he was two months later while Edgar was with some whore cheerleader or something.

It hurt a lot. It hurt worse than when Devi left. It hurt worse than anything else he'd experienced, Getting shot and even falling from Heaven didn't compare to this. It was worse with the way that Edgar left. Touching Nny's cheek so sweetly as he whispered that he understood that Nny wasn't ready and that Edgar would always love him no matter what. Edgar had _apologized_ for the night.

He hadn't wanted an apology! He wanted...he didn't know what he wanted! He felt stuck. He felt blessed and cursed all at the same time. It felt so right, so wrong, so confusing! Now that thing he had wanted was gone, he knew it. He longed for it, he wanted it so bad. Edgar had it, only Edgar had it, Nny was sure about that as he lay in the shambles of his living room.

"I didn't need you to apologize, dammit! I needed you to-...I just needed-...just tell me..."

Nny looked up dully to see that his door was open. There a figure stood in the doorway, watching him have a psychotic breakdown in the fetal position.

 _Just call me angel of the morning, (angel)_  
 _Just touch my cheek before you leave me, baby_  
 _Just call me angel of the morning, (angel)_  
 _Just touch my cheek before you leave me, darling_  
 _Just call me angel of the morning, angel_  
 _Just touch my cheek before you leave me, darling_


End file.
